I had something I wanted to write about; a chat I had with a new acquaintance(?) of mine, but I got a comment and some brutally honest advice and criticism about what I’ve been doing. And I want to say that I thoroughly appreciated it. I’m not going to recap what was written, but instead I think I’ll cut and paste what was written. The only things I want to point out is that it IS long and you’ll need to click through to read it all. There were a lot of points being made. Secondly, I think I got defensive…but I’m not sure. Also, I’m going to take a break from doing all this for awhile. This person’s comments really taught me that I have to rethink what I’m doing and why I’m doing this in the first place, also to probably actually read through what I write before posting to make sure everything is where it needs to be. (Please note Friday’s post was from an MSN article as the writer points out. I think that’s the first time I missed adding a link. If you know it can you please send it to me so I can correct my mistake. Thank you.)
Update: I don’t know why I put an update tag, but wow…I really am defensive. I’m sorry, its hard to be objective about this stuff, or is it subjective, I always get those two mixed up. *sigh* Sometimes I just have to keep my big mouth shut. Heh…
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Thank you for your comments. Its greatly appreciated and much needed. As for blog posts, I understand what you’re saying and take it to heart. You are incredibly observant and I thank you for your insight. I guess I thought I was giving an opinion, but you’re right, its really a retelling of what I read, which doesn’t make sense since the reader can simply go to the link and read the article for themselves. I believe this blog needs a massive reformatting from me and a new way of doing things. I may start from scratch as I value the opinion you just gave me. I am very new to this whole blogging thing, even if I have been doing it for months. I haven’t gotten any constructive criticism, and as a result…I have no reason to grow and evolve and become a blog I actually want this to be.
On the subject of advice. I thought I was giving some, but often you’re right, I’ve mentioned this blog is part of my own personally therapy. I have many demons I’m fighting, and therefore, my “advice” is possibly skewed or rants or whatever. I don’t think I’ve made it a secret that this is blog is more to help me through my attempts to share what I’ve learned. But that does include my conflicting feelings. I was hoping to provide a fairly accurate representation of the kind of turmoil people go through when dealing with something they consider serious. But again, everyone has their own opinion.
I don’t quite know what you consider an authentic or credible relationship. If you can please elaborate, it will be greatly appreciated. I suppose you are saying I’ve never had a real relationship, and that may be possible. But, in all honesty, the authenticity of my relationships cannot be judged. I guess that’s the other thing I’ve failed to portray on this blog and my podcast is that no two relationships are alike, and each person will have relationships with people that may or may not agree with everyone. That doesn’t make it any less credible or less authentic. Its like saying, have you really eaten good pasta? Its all a matter of taste and point of view. Everyone experiences everything differently, and I wouldn’t judge a person’s relationship because it was different from mine. It was important to them, it was big to them, even if you think its childish or immature or non-credible. That doesn’t devalue their relationship just because it doesn’t fit into your box. This is my relationship, this is my take, and this is my therapy.
Yes, I do talk like that in my podcasts, and yes I do change my voice a little at the beginning, but in the middle it evens out. I’m a thespian, its a sad reality and probably a detriment to my ability to maintain or gain an audience. Put a mic in front of me and I become a ham. I appreciate where your’e coming from, though, honestly, but alas I kind of talk like that in my everyday life sometimes. But the fact that I do it late at night/early in the morning would hopefully show that I’m not trying to take myself too seriously. I’m self deprecating, and I never claim to know everything and anything. The only reason I do this podcast is for people to hopefully get something out of it. If you get nothing out of it, you don’t have to listen. If it doesn’t help you in any way, you don’t have to download. I will admit, this podcast isn’t for everyone or anyone. If I had an audience of one, I’d keep doing it just because its fun for me. I take it somewhat seriously simply because I don’t want to ramble over and over again, I want to have some coherency. But people download, people listen, and when that stops, I will stop.
The season thing. I should have explained why I did that. I did it because the place I’m uploading my podcasts has a cap on the amount of Megabytes I can upload. So I only had enough space for 16 or so podcasts, so I figured I’d take a break and see if I can’t get that extra space. I again, appreciate your constructive criticism, and that’s why I did it.
I have no disillusions that my podcast is good or great, and I certainly agree with you on the blog posts. I really didn’t know what to write or how to go about posting stuff, but your input was valuable and will help me improve what I’m writing. Brutal honesty is missing from this world, and you weren’t being malicious, just honest, and it didn’t fall on deaf ears. Thanks again, and you’ve actually given me a new blog post, this comment.
Mister Wizard 
You had a tweet that said you wish you knew why people hated your stuff. I happened upon this blog by accident and I’ve only barely skimmed your stuff, but I would say maybe a big part of it, especially related to this post, is plagiarism. On Friday I saw an article on MSN that had the two first points on it verbatim. The thing is, if you’re going to copy something, reference where you got it from. And if you absolutely have to try and pass something off on your own, at least make it sound original. Don’t talk about past relationships? Dictating about friends? Every article on relationships has had crap like this in one variation or another and it’s been done to death.
You seem to take the majority of your blog posts from articles on other websites you reference and then add your own twist. But your twist isn’t anything new or insightful on what the original author said. Just basically rephrasing what they say.
Which brings me to my next point. Do you even have any relationship advice to give? Any real experience from a mature relationship? From what I can tell by your blog posts, you allude at times to how horrible your ex was. You insinuate cheating and being mistreated, then you fawn over how much you miss her and how you should have been different. Other than being married, which doesn’t sound like it could constitute as much from the way you describe it, have you had any type of authentic or credible relationship?
I can’t comment too much on the podcast because honestly, I can’t get through it. Is that your real voice? I’m not talking about your pitch or saying you have some comical cartoon voice. Just that it sounds like you are putting on this weird voice and tone just because you are broadcasting. Its like some caricature of what a cheesy weatherman or easy listening disc jockey would sound like. It sounds like you take yourself way too seriously with this.
The only other thing I can say is why are you doing the podcast in “seasons”? Not even the most listened podcasts have their episodes divided into seasons. It’s a personal podcast. Not network TV or even a web series. There’s nothing to discern the end of one season and the beginning of another. It isn’t necessary. And why have two podcasts when you’re barely trying to make the first one work? Maybe focus on making the first one a bit better before you start branching out.
You asked for some feedback and I assumed no one was giving it to you. Not trying to tear you a new asshole or anything, I’m just being honest. Brutally honest maybe, but someone has to do it. If you have a day job, don’t quit it.