The Good:
Stanford University did a study on how love affects pain. In brief, newly in love people feel less pain because their brain reacts as if on cocaine or morphine. We’re on an emotional high that makes us giddy and distracted that we don’t feel a lot of things. So romantics have another reason in their belt to fall in love. Not only do you get butterflies and sometimes feel kind of light headed and sick from being around a person you’re absolutely gaga for, but you also can’t feel pain when they kick you in the groin for saying something insulting to them. Just because you love them, doesn’t mean they love you back.
But my only problem with this study is that only 15 students were used. Is 15 really enough people to determine that love actually reduces pain? Because isn’t love a human construct that everyone interprets differently? And…what’s the benefit of learning that love reduces pain? Is it just that it acts like a drug in our system? I thought we knew that. Now I’m not a researcher nor did I go to Stanford University, but part of me just doesn’t understand why this study happened in the first place. Its cool to know, but I don’t know how much that’ll change our lives. I still think its great, because it reinforces the power of love which I’m an advocate for. Love is awesome, and continues to do strange things to us human beings.
via: Asylum: Love Relieves Physical Pain Much Like Cocaine Does
The Bad:
As if I hadn’t talked enough about rejection I read an article on Coed Magazine that talks about 4 reasons why a man or woman would be rejected by a girl. The four are as follows: She’s off the market, she’s got history, she’s a flirt, and she’s just not that into you. Those four reasons make sense, because the article is about the things you can’t control. I agree that those are very legitimate reasons why a girl will reject you. And of course, the only real advice for that is to move on. But those aren’t the only reasons a woman may reject you, because most often times its you.
Yep, that’s the harsh reality. You can tell your friends that you’re great, you’re funny, or that you didn’t do anything wrong, but its really just you. Maybe its the way you look, or act, or talk. Not everyone will like you, not every girl will swoon at your charm. I guess that’s kind of common sense, but we often turn a blind eye to that. So maybe we’re unaware of what makes us…unattractive. Maybe we try to ignore the fact that we’re annoying. But the thing is we’re surrounded by good people who want to lift you up or tell you a kind lie because they like you and don’t want to hurt your feelings.
This is mildly off topic, but to the point. Last week I posted a comment I got from the person passing through, and that person criticized the blog and the podcast and me as a person, all in one foul swoop. Now, I know I’m not going to appeal to everyone, but that’s the first person to ever give me the real deal. I mean, not to say that my friends weren’t being honest about the site and the podcast, but they are my friends. They’ll be nice to me, they’ll be kind about their comments, and they’ll soften the blow. That random commenter laid it all out, and that’s what I needed. That’s why…I will try to do things differently. Hopefully beginning with this post.
That’s what brings us here. I think we need impartial people in our lives who will give us the facts without sugar coating it. To tell us that we’re unattractive, or annoying, or we are overbearing. At least that will give us insight as to why we’re getting rejected. The fact of the matter is, there’s little advice I can give to someone who doesn’t truly know their own faults. We’re afraid of them, as any normal person would be, but we do need to face them. I hope you out there find someone willing to be honest to you about what makes you desirable or undesirable. Preferably unbiased, and preferably not an ex, because they’ll most likely be biased. And for those who do know the truth, be aware that you can change those traits for the most part, if you want to. And even if you’re not one to change, that doesn’t make you any less of a person. You’re just happy with who you are, someone will love it, and you’ll feel less physical pain as a result.
via: Coed Magazine: 4 Reasons Why She Rejected You
The Honesty:
So did anything I say help you or enlighten you in any way? Was it stupid and ridiculous? I’d love to hear your opinions on anything in this post and past ones. Maybe my grammar was off or my ideas are too kookie or simple minded. Because if I’m not doing something to inform, help, entertain or at least…get you to think, then this blog is pretty pointless. And I’d prefer it have a point.
