WRITTEN BY DANI THE UNIVERSE – danidanirevolution@gmail.com
I was having a good ol rsquo; fashioned chat with a friend the other night (drunk in his car outside of a dive bar with a taco in my hand while I bitch and moan is my idea of ldquo;good ol rsquo; fashioned chat rdquo; and no one will tell me otherwise) and the topic of flirting came up. Now my friend being something of a * cough * ladies rsquo; man, I just had to ask: Why flirt when you rsquo;re not actually interested? I was, of course, referring to a fellow brony I had met who, judging from how much attention he had been giving me, had seemed like he might at some point ask for my number hellip; but never did. And that rsquo;s fine. No sleep was lost and no tears were shed. This really was not the first time something of this nature had happened (very similar things occurred last Friday night but thanks to the genius who invented the Long Island, I can rsquo;t recall enough to make a cohesive story) and I rsquo;m genuinely curious as to why someone would make the effort to appear interested and never actually do anything about it. My friend enlightened me:
APPARENTLY hellip; even incredibly attractive people can have absolutely zero self-confidence. He went on to tell me a story about a friend of his; smart, charismatic, and apparently gorgeous enough to cause my friend to develop something of a man-crush. He was so sure this guy was getting laid on a nightly basis hellip; and was sorely disappointed. Mr. Tall, dark and charming was apparently rendered speechless in front of women. From what I can recall of this story, they were at a restaurant and this seemingly handsome guy was having the worst trouble talking to the waitress mdash;the same one my friend had (and I don rsquo;t doubt this for a second) hit on numerous times. So what gives?
Now I rsquo;m not necessarily saying this is such a terrible thing; the only thing I enjoy more than staring at eye candy is knowing said candy isn rsquo;t also an arrogant douchebag with an ego the size of a small moon. Yet with all of the compliments such men are sure to get, it stands to reason that they rsquo;d have at least built up a significant amount of confidence (at least enough to write their number on a napkin and leave it on their table for the waitress to find.) So how is it that they remain so shy?
Another aspect that baffles me is the notion that they can be self-confident enough to look women in the eye and smile (which I hear is terrifying) but not enough to open their mouth and say something. Where is all of this ldquo;half-courage rdquo; coming from and what keeps guys from making that final effort? Some might say it rsquo;s the fear of rejection rearing its ugly head but from a purely logical standpoint, it rsquo;s a statistical improbability that anyone who looks like the brony I met would be facing rejection on a regular basis.
I know I shouldn rsquo;t generalize; what causes shyness in one guy would not necessarily be the issue with another. For all I know, Mr. Can rsquo;t-talk-to-the-waitress might have been a really fat kid and just never grew out of that mindset. I suppose it rsquo;s just strange to realize that women aren rsquo;t the only ones who suffer from, what I affectionately refer to as, extreme modesty. Maybe even hot guys need that extra push. We all knew geek guys and neckbeards have always had a crippling case of ldquo;The Little Ego That Couldn rsquo;t rdquo; but maybe they rsquo;re not the only ones who need the support. If nerds, geeks, and basement dwellers are having the exact same issues as women and hot guys, maybe someone should invest in a damn support group or something.
