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What Happened To The Phonies? The Big, Fat Phony!

2012 is the year of reality. Humans really landed a high tech rover onto Mars, the Jersey Shore is really going off the air, Bronies really became a phenomenon, comic book movies are really a thing (and that’s awesome), and the President of the United States really did an AMA on Reddit. Those things really happened. And in the vein of reality, I’m curious if there’s a change in reality for women. I bet you all didn’t see this coming, but I’m curious if the lies known as implants are a thing of a past. Specifically, the fake boobies.

Keep in mind, I have no point of reference but my own experience on this subject, but in the state where Hollywood is king, clubs are a way of life, and thin is in, I’ve been noticing a change in the weather when it comes to the ladies and their bodies. Mainly their chesty area. Did I lose you? Because I lost myself on that last, stupid sentence. Now, here’s another disclaimer, I can’t really tell if breasts are fake without seeing them in the flesh. So, maybe women’s clothing are just really good at hiding huge, fake breasts. Now, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with big breasts, as I appreciate them in all their shapes and forms, for the most part. Also if that’s what a lady wants, then more power to them. It also doesn’t hurt that larger mammaries may encourage motorboating, and other lascivious activities, which is cool. But is this trend of getting huge chesticles on the decline?

Okay, before you read on, I will be using all forms of terminology for breasts, and not all of them are “grown up”. So please don’t complain that I’m using words like knockers, hooters, etc. That’s the extent of explaining myself, because holy crap, who wants to use the word “breasts” the entire time? So anyway, bazongas, from my observation, and yes…I know your eyes are up there…seem rather, “natural” lately. During the summer months, and in California, that can be all year long sometimes, it was hard not to notice the tank tops and low cut clothing that were worn throughout. The cleaveage was out in force, and those that were out on display, at least to me, looked free of any…enhancements (other than bras, probably.)

Personally, I’m not a fan of augmented reality, where the party cannons are sporting the saline, or silicone, or whatnot. If you’re naturally big there, then fantastic, if you’re not, I still think that’s fantastic. I understand that guys love tig ole bitties, and I recall my friends and I loving college in the summer, because the ladies just bared their bazookas in tiny tops and tight t’s. But really, what’s wrong with what nature gave you? Is it so bad, ladies, that your gazongas are not the size of bowling balls? Can you not be proud of your A’s, and B’s? I realize that maybe they’re harder to flaunt, but what’s so bad about that? Still, I get it, if a woman is unhappy with her body, she will want to change it. Still, I’m a weird advocate for just having what you have. Ladies, you work so hard and do so much to look attractive, for whomever and whatever reason, thank you. I appreciate it is not easy being a woman.

But currently, and maybe I just don’t go to the right parts of town, and either it’s the bad economy, or guys are just into the more “natural” look, but I’m noticing that fewer and fewer women are enlarging their funbags. Maybe women just don’t care anymore. Maybe they look down, poke them a bit and nod approvingly. Please, I’d appreciate some perspective on this ladies. Speaking of shape and size, why is the rack so important, but the ass is fine being what it is? I’m not trying to encourage more augmentation of othe body, but for years people were talking about how amazing J-Lo or Kim Kardashian’s ass looked, but I never saw or heard or read anything about a rise in butt implants. There are ass men out there who love to look at a woman in a short skirt or right pair of jeans. Why did that never blow up as a thing? Where are all the people with inflated cheeks? I find that strange difference, to be strange.

Either way, I’m personally happy to see that the ladies are leaving their hooters alone. I love women as is, and would never think “Well, her cha cha’s are looking a bit on the small side”. From the small to the ginormous, it’s nice to see that there are fewer phonies, and more real pompoms in the world. Again, that’s just MY thing, other men may really love a large, altered rack. Nothing wrong with that, to each their own of course. It’s also strange, because it’s not like men go out of their way to change their tiny penis into a huge anaconda. Of course, that’s scarier I guess, but still, men have to live with what they got. May not be everyone’s cup of tea, but we work with what we have packing. Hmm, men, would you get your penis enlarged through surgery if you could?

Men and ladies out there, I’d like to know your thoughts on my observational decline of fake tah-tahs. Am I wrong? Are fake boobs still a thing? Ladies, what do you think is the reason for why the natural jugs are all good now? Men, are you missing or yearn for the huge, artificial marimbas? Share your thoughts in the comments below. And for now, love the twins, the girls, the mounds, the pillows, and the cones, no matter how they are. And yes, I’m hating on implants.